Awkward Silence
by Grav
Summary: After the events of "Fallout", Jonas has a much needed conversation.


AN: Jonas angst? Good lord, what have I done? Mostly, this was written because I never get to hear the conversations I want to on the actual show, so I write them myself.

Spoilers: Fallout and back.

Disclaimer: Dude, I didn't even get the _action figures _for Christmas.

Summary: After the events of Fallout, Jonas has a much needed conversation.

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Awkward Silence 

"So."

"So."

It had been a busy day. Reconnect with old friends, save the planet, have life shaken up and throw in a large serving of self-recrimination for good measure; there was never a dull moment in the life of Jonas Quinn.

But the day was over now, and most of his serious problems had been solved by a tactical nuke. There still remained one problem, however, and he had no idea how to deal with it. Currently, he was in the middle of a very awkward silence.

"What's a lotar?"

Her question caught him off-guard. With the exception of the pleasantries involved in hanging her coat, neither of them had spoken in quite some time. Her coat, and his for that matter, were in the closet, his tea was getting cold, and he couldn't think what in the world to say to her.

"I beg your pardon?"

He was buying time, but hoped she wouldn't notice. He had not expected her to accept his invitation, which he had offered only because he was the best qualified of anyone on his planet to talk to her. A café had been far too public for what they were going to talk about and the lab too…familiar. He had never taken her, it, to his house before, and so here they were. And the tea was definitely cold.

"What is a lotar?"

Damn it, he'd heard correctly. He had a sudden realization as to where this conversation was headed.

"It's a, um, it's a p-position in a Goa'uld System Lord's court," he stammered. "The, uh, favourite slave."

"Oh."

And there was Kianna's plan for galactic domination summed up in one very short, very awkward syllable.

There were several more moments of silence, during which time Jonas forgot the state of his tea and took a sip. He swallowed hard, forgetting how brackish it tasted when it was cold and tried not to make a face.

"I remember kissing you." She said it in the same tone she used to lecture students about the elements involved in the naquadah/naquadria conversion. He managed to not knock his tea cup over when he set it down.

"R-really?" He found himself strangely unable to stop blinking.

"I was terrified." She laughed, and he thought it sounded a little different than it had before. "Every time you kissed me, she would threaten to leave me, and fill my head with pictures of you with a Goa'uld sliding down your throat while I died in front of you."

Well, it wasn't ideal, but it was talk, and he remembered not to drink his tea.

"And I would scream and scream at you to get away, but you couldn't hear me. And I couldn't stop, because she wouldn't let me." She stared at her hands, and he realized she hadn't looked at him in lately. "But I knew she couldn't do it. They would notice if you were taken host. Hence the, uh, lotar plan."

"Lotars have to be completely loyal. She honestly thought that after I knew what she was, I would even be able to _look_ at – " He cut his outburst short, but not short enough.

She turned very pale, and looked straight at him for the first time in hours. He wished he could think of the words to fix the mess he'd just created.

"I should never have come." She pushed her chair back.

"Kianna!" He was desperate that she not leave yet. Not like this. She froze. "I don't even know if Kianna is your name, or if it's hers."

"It's mine," she said quietly, slumping over her tea cup. "I'm named from my – "

"Your grandmother." He hated that everything he knew about her came from the snake.

"Yes. I was." She glanced at him, and then lowered her gaze to her hands again. "Kissing you, well, it wasn't all bad."

He set down his tea placed his hands on the table. She reached out and covered them with her own and he linked his fingers with hers.

"I'm not who you think I am, Jonas."

"I know."

"Major Carter said it would be strange."

"Daniel told me I should count my blessings."

She smiled, and he released her hands to start the kettle again. He turned back to look at her, his face lit up with his characteristic smile. Slowly, she returned it, and by the time the water boiled, the silence wasn't awkward anymore.

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**fin**

AN: Well, that actually went better than I expected. Which is only fair given the amount of time I have spent mocking him.


End file.
